Friday, December 19, 2008

A Special Message to Singles… (or to those who are alone)

As you know, it’s just a few days before Christmas. I felt compelled to write a brief message to those who are single, as well as to those who may be alone at Christmas. For those who are single, sometimes Christmas can be a difficult time. Since I have been single all my life, I feel qualified to speak into this. I can tell you that there were many times in the past that I found Christmas to be a sad time because it seems to be more family-oriented, and when you don’t have a family, you tend to feel like maybe something is missing. I can’t remember exactly when it happened, but a few years ago, I made a shift in the mind-set that I normally had as the Christmas holidays approached. I decided that I was going to make the very best of it, and to enjoy special moments with my extended family as well as my close circle of friends. I also decided to try to think about those who have lost loved ones recently must feel, having to face the emptiness of missing someone who is normally around sharing the joy of the season. I also made the decision to think about how blessed I am having a place to live and food to eat, as opposed to those that I may see on the news that are eating at a homeless shelter. I also found out about some single friends of mine who would make it a point at Thanksgiving and Christmas to go serve food to those in the inner city who were eating in soup kitchens and rescue missions. I thought how cool that they would choose to give themselves to do that.

I’m not trying to diminish the fact that I know it can be difficult for people who are single, but sometimes I think we have to make a choice to remember how really blessed we are. I know that when I spent a couple of weeks in Rwanda and met many of the survivors of the genocide whose arms and legs had been taken with machetes and yet they were still managing to function, I became very convicted at the moments I spend in any form of self-pity or temptation to think that my life is empty. I found these Rwandans so grateful to God that they are still alive, even though their entire family- mom, dad, and siblings – were killed right before their very eyes, yet somehow their life was spared. I think as a single person, we have to choose to remember that God is always with us and there are always others that we can reach out to. After all, isn’t that where real joy comes from?

As you are reading this, I hope that you will make a choice to look forward to the next few days with great anticipation of what God may have you do and who He may have you reach out to. It will make all the difference. I challenge you to get your mind off of yourself and on to others that you can lift up and encourage. Thanks for taking the time to read this.



eyestotheeast said...

that's good stuff - thanks for the reminder

Anonymous said...

youre right. i felt so much joy & excitement buyin gifts for family & friends & my students that i KNOW theyre gona looove. im single but today felt so great preparing to give & actually giving :)

Girl of Mercy 91' said...

Please pray for my father in law his wife left him the beginning of this month and they were married for 34 years. Yesterday, I asked him how he was doing cause he had stayed in his room all day with the light of so I thought he was sick. When he came out and I asked him he said, he was sick of life and sick of living. He is in a depression over what has taken place with his wife but she has not been the same since she came out of the hospital over her going manic for stopping taking her meds for her bipolar.It has been a struggle for him and I know he is concerned for his wife cause of her state of mind. Just praying for healing in her mind and emotions and that God will restore their marriage.. thanks for sharing this message cause it is true how hard it is for those who are alone on holidays...God bless you Nancy

SingsMercy said...

i'm tempted to say "happy holidays" because i know how much you love that one. LOL. i bet "merry XMAS" really gets on your nerves.

anywho, thanks for the single shout out. Happy Christmas, Fearless Leader. (yes, i said "happy". it's how the British say it and you know i secretly want to be British!)

Suzanne said...

Thank you for sharing and encouraging those of us who are single. Christmas is difficult at times, and lonely; yet it isn't for long around here. I direct a Tutoring Program for at risk youth and these last two days Christmas donations have been flooding my apartment for the youth! I can't wait to give them out and remind these precious young ones once again that "They are NOT fogotten!"

-Mercy Grad. '07

MercyMinistries09 said...

Hey Nancy,

I can't tell you how great God is. Tonight, I came home from work discouraged at the fact that EVERYONE I know is married and is having their date nights, shopping for their husbands and are having this totally romantic, loving season while I'm single. I don't have a date to go and here I am alone on a Friday night yet again. I've been so discouraged with that and today I've really been struggling with the thoughts of "Ok....maybe your standards are just TOO high". He doesn't need to be this great Christian guy, you're going to turn 28 in a couple of months, you need to get the move on and just settle for the best possible candidate" and I was really tempted to just get a hold of a guy that is not good for me at all just so I could have someone to hang out with and validate that lonliness.

So anyways...that is the kind of day I had and then I got home and read your note on Facebook. It was like a fan for the fire to continue to do what God has called me to do and be obedient to His standard for my life.

Thanks for sharing your heart Nancy. Love ya.

~Michelle, Sacramento, CA

joanna said...

Thank you Nancy for being transparent and encouraging those of us out there that are still single. You're so right, the holidays can be a time when we're tempted to look at what we may not have. I've chosen to do as you've done and enjoy all the people that God has placed in my life as "spiritual family" and thank Him for the years of His faithfulness. I also keep contending for what may be up ahead on my path, knowing that I will be even more grateful for what He eventually blesses me with in this area. God is SO FAITHFUL!